Thursday 23 August 2012
Progress Report #1
Weight: 82.7kg
Overall Loss: 10.4kg
Hey there!
So it'd been a while since I posted anything on how I was going, and given my track record you could all have been forgiven for assuming that I had regressed into some sort of white, pastey Jaba The Hutt.
Luckily, this is not the case. I have gone back to semi normal-ness I suppose. I've had a big night out on the town (another story) in the rei, where I hung out for a few days. I managed to get out and go for a run while up there as there was no gym readily available, and my eating remained fairly good, but I did indulge a little in the drunk/hungover stage of the weekend, which left me with a little ground to make up when I got back.
Essentially, when I left Auckland I clocked in at 83.3kg. Upon my return I had boosted all the way back to 85. Holy shit, I literally almost dropped a bomb in my jocks right there on the scales. Luckily, a bit of hard work this week and some healthy eating has bought me back down to my new low as you see above. Thank sweet baby jesus, this would have been a much more awkward update had that not been the case.
Still a ways to go, I can't really remember whether I specified this earlier, but my goal weight at the moment is 80kg. Not too far to go now, right? Wrong. Damn.
Basically, I want to be a jacked to f*ck 80. None of this residual beer gut, just washboard shit that 1820's women dream of having in their washhouse. THAT, is going to take some work. I've reached out to a couple of people who have been AMAZING with information and suggestions on how to proceed from here, and I'm starting to form a game plan for achieving my goal, so I'll update again from time to time as things of interest/importance occur so everyone is on the same page.
Hope this sh*t still interests you, atleast it wont be clogging up your news feed as much as in the past.
Keep it real yo!
P.S. I realise I forgot to post a picture of my sweet gift to myself, so will post that as it's own post as soon as I can be bothered going down stairs to get my phone/camera.
Overall Loss: 10.4kg
Hey there!
So it'd been a while since I posted anything on how I was going, and given my track record you could all have been forgiven for assuming that I had regressed into some sort of white, pastey Jaba The Hutt.
Luckily, this is not the case. I have gone back to semi normal-ness I suppose. I've had a big night out on the town (another story) in the rei, where I hung out for a few days. I managed to get out and go for a run while up there as there was no gym readily available, and my eating remained fairly good, but I did indulge a little in the drunk/hungover stage of the weekend, which left me with a little ground to make up when I got back.
Essentially, when I left Auckland I clocked in at 83.3kg. Upon my return I had boosted all the way back to 85. Holy shit, I literally almost dropped a bomb in my jocks right there on the scales. Luckily, a bit of hard work this week and some healthy eating has bought me back down to my new low as you see above. Thank sweet baby jesus, this would have been a much more awkward update had that not been the case.
Still a ways to go, I can't really remember whether I specified this earlier, but my goal weight at the moment is 80kg. Not too far to go now, right? Wrong. Damn.
Basically, I want to be a jacked to f*ck 80. None of this residual beer gut, just washboard shit that 1820's women dream of having in their washhouse. THAT, is going to take some work. I've reached out to a couple of people who have been AMAZING with information and suggestions on how to proceed from here, and I'm starting to form a game plan for achieving my goal, so I'll update again from time to time as things of interest/importance occur so everyone is on the same page.
Hope this sh*t still interests you, atleast it wont be clogging up your news feed as much as in the past.
Keep it real yo!
P.S. I realise I forgot to post a picture of my sweet gift to myself, so will post that as it's own post as soon as I can be bothered going down stairs to get my phone/camera.
Wednesday 8 August 2012
Post Fight Review- 30 Days Up.
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| Day 1 |
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| Day 30 |
Weight: 85kg
Total Loss over 30 Days: 8.1kg
Okay. So I didn't quite get to close this thing out in the fashion I would have liked, but as I have said a million times, I am far from done, so watch this space!
I suppose first of all, I want to cover off a couple of things. I can see this post becoming increasingly self-indulgent, which is the last thing I want. To put things in perspective, it has only been 30 days. One month is far from a trial in the grand scheme of things, and I am more than aware of that. I'm not sitting here on my laptop, admiring my sweet Adonis pecks with the impression that I have completed some massive undertaking by any means.
Having said that, it has been a pretty big change for me, and I do intend to continue on from here along the same line, which is what it was really all about. One month of changed behaviour does not a skuxx make, but a life time of better habits and a different mind-set should eventually result in b*tches washing their clothes on my abs... I think...
Secondly, 8 odd kilograms is not the world’s biggest weight loss. If you've seen the biggest loser, you know more can be achieved in a shorter space of time. I gave this a pretty good shot, while trying to maintain a pretty normal life so I'm happy with that progress, but I am aware more is possible, and admire those with the dedication to achieve it.
ALRIGHT, that should keep me from sounding like a vein a**hole right? Good.
So all up it's been a lot of stir fry, a sh*t ton of protein powder and ample time spent in the gymnasium, but it's also been fun as hell. I'm seriously going to miss writing these things every night (mainly because it feeds my massive ego). They've provided me with something to help me focus, a chance to exercise my brain in trying to make them semi entertaining, and given me a direct line to people to the tune of over 2000 hits over the last month.
That's 2000 people who gave a sh*t enough to read about me skuxxing up, which is HUGE to me. I don't even care about my progress that much, yet there are all of these people at least clicking the link every night, despite the fact that it's just Kyle 24/7. The support I received during this month has been huge, and is an excellent motivation to continue and blossom into the muscly as veloceraptor I'm sure is hiding somewhere in here. I've had congratulations, recommendations, light ribbing and HEAPs of encouragement. Thank you all for that, you've been AWESOME.
In case it's of help to anyone, I've used a few different things along the way, and will continue to do so, so I figured I'd chuck a shout out to the tools of the skuxx trade in here for sh*ts and gigs.
To track my progress, I've been using the My Fitness Pal app on my phone. It's free for f*ck sake, so you cant really go wrong. it tracks your calorie intake, lets you log your weight each day (and displays it on a super pimp graph), and adjusts as required to suit your goals. REAL HANDY.
I've been using protein powder throughout the month, generally for afternoon tea or to replace a smallish meal. The stuff I used was Myofusion Probiotic protein powder, which comes in like a trillion (read: fiveish) flavours and was pretty well recommended/reasonably priced. I got it through bodybuilding.co.nz, who are AWESOME to deal with. As I mentioned earlier in one of my posts, they're really quick, pretty cheap, and offer great service. Also, they were kind enough to hook me up with some samples toward the beginning so that was great. Seriously recommend using them... And not because they bought my love with protein powder...
In terms of habits and things, I upped my meals to 6 a day, and reduced portion sizes. I replaced BK and McDonalds with lite yoghurts and fruit, and as I've bitched about a million times used stir fry and wraps primarily as dinners. Anyone with moderate cooking skill would be able to do better I'm sure, it seems to be all about not deep frying everything... who would have thunk it?
I also started gyming 4-5 times a week. I personally have been interspersing cardio and weights to break it up with each session, but this is pretty time consuming so probably not for everyone.
I don't really want to ramble on, so I'll leave it there. Thank you all for following this disgusting pile of self-love, I'll keep this sh*t going so you haven’t wasted too much time reading it. I may or may not post from time to time to update things, I had thought about doing an update once a week or something, but am unsure whether it would be worth reading, so we'll see how we go. Hope you've enjoyed the ride, if you want signed copies of the skuxx as pictures I've posted just hit me up (ladies). I don't want to see them on Trademe though, that’s just disrespectful.
PEACE!
Tuesday 7 August 2012
Day Mo'F*ckin' THIRTY Bitches!
Weight: 84.4kg
Finally back down to my lowest weight in years, so thats a nice feeling. Hopefully today served as one last push to really drive me under that, but we wont know that until the morning, so for now I shall bask in the glory of being back down to that.
Not much to add today, tomorrow will be a post of reflection and will include my final weigh in, so thats probably going to be the long winded boring post. For tonight I have the gym, have had yet another stir fry, and will await anxiously tomorrows result.
Stoked to have made it, but still looking forward at how far I have to go before people start mistaking me for The Situation. Tune in tomorrow for a full recap (if you can be bothered).
FUCKIN' BOO-YAH!
Finally back down to my lowest weight in years, so thats a nice feeling. Hopefully today served as one last push to really drive me under that, but we wont know that until the morning, so for now I shall bask in the glory of being back down to that.
Not much to add today, tomorrow will be a post of reflection and will include my final weigh in, so thats probably going to be the long winded boring post. For tonight I have the gym, have had yet another stir fry, and will await anxiously tomorrows result.
Stoked to have made it, but still looking forward at how far I have to go before people start mistaking me for The Situation. Tune in tomorrow for a full recap (if you can be bothered).
FUCKIN' BOO-YAH!
Monday 6 August 2012
Day Twenty Nine- Sushi can suck my diddle.
Weight: 84.6
Loss For The Week: 0.4kg
Total Loss: 8.5kg
GOD DAMN IT! I'm blaming sushi for this stagnation! Come on, man. I work out, I eat well, and somehow go nowhere? Carbs are not my friend. That has to be it... Either that or I'm getting muscly as and I am just unaware of it... I don't feel muscly though...
Not really that upset though, it's a long, hard road to skuxxdom, and noone ever reaches the end without s trial or two. Luckily I assume everything is sorted out Alex The Kid style, and I'll paper-scissors-rock my way right through this b*tch!
Last day of this trial tomorrow ladies and gents! I do have to apologise to all my 50 Shades readers out there (Read: women), as I realise my weekly picture update if probably a highlight of your week, but I swear I'll throw a pic or two up on wednesday when I recap this b*tch! In the mean time, I'm going to go eat my hand to try and get some last minute progress before tomorrow... Wait, that wont work... Damn.
Loss For The Week: 0.4kg
Total Loss: 8.5kg
GOD DAMN IT! I'm blaming sushi for this stagnation! Come on, man. I work out, I eat well, and somehow go nowhere? Carbs are not my friend. That has to be it... Either that or I'm getting muscly as and I am just unaware of it... I don't feel muscly though...
Not really that upset though, it's a long, hard road to skuxxdom, and noone ever reaches the end without s trial or two. Luckily I assume everything is sorted out Alex The Kid style, and I'll paper-scissors-rock my way right through this b*tch!
Last day of this trial tomorrow ladies and gents! I do have to apologise to all my 50 Shades readers out there (Read: women), as I realise my weekly picture update if probably a highlight of your week, but I swear I'll throw a pic or two up on wednesday when I recap this b*tch! In the mean time, I'm going to go eat my hand to try and get some last minute progress before tomorrow... Wait, that wont work... Damn.
Sunday 5 August 2012
Day Twenty Eight- 4 Weeks Down... 2 Days to go
Weight: 84.6kg
UGH, I would love to know what bumped me back up from the 84.4 I recorded the other day. Whatever it was; I WILL be making it my b*tch for the next two days. I would love to break the 83s before the end of this, though that seems to be getting more and more far fetched as the days go by... Not giving up though, quitters never win, and winners always win... That's the saying, right?
Had a lovely rest day yesterday, and had planned on another today, but sitting on my still rather plump ass didn't seem to be the most positive thing I could be doing with two days to go, so I got out and jammed around for a few hours, had a light sushi related lunch (which, in retrospect, probably wont help the cause) and hit the gym anyway. I did only take it easy today, because the old muscles are still a wee bit tender, but I figured a light walk and some crunches couldn't hurt.
Note: I was wrong about the crunches. They definately CAN hurt.
Anyway; bit of a heads up. There will be no picture up tomorrow (sorry, ladies.) as I figured it'd be better to save it until the final post. Also, Tuesday is obviously my last day, but the final edition of KMPFG will be Wednesday so I can take the final result from that morning, reflect on the month, and subsequently ramble on for paragraph after paragraph about how it went, what I felt worked, what I wish I hadn't done, and my celeb crushes. Obviously.
UGH, I would love to know what bumped me back up from the 84.4 I recorded the other day. Whatever it was; I WILL be making it my b*tch for the next two days. I would love to break the 83s before the end of this, though that seems to be getting more and more far fetched as the days go by... Not giving up though, quitters never win, and winners always win... That's the saying, right?
Had a lovely rest day yesterday, and had planned on another today, but sitting on my still rather plump ass didn't seem to be the most positive thing I could be doing with two days to go, so I got out and jammed around for a few hours, had a light sushi related lunch (which, in retrospect, probably wont help the cause) and hit the gym anyway. I did only take it easy today, because the old muscles are still a wee bit tender, but I figured a light walk and some crunches couldn't hurt.
Note: I was wrong about the crunches. They definately CAN hurt.
Anyway; bit of a heads up. There will be no picture up tomorrow (sorry, ladies.) as I figured it'd be better to save it until the final post. Also, Tuesday is obviously my last day, but the final edition of KMPFG will be Wednesday so I can take the final result from that morning, reflect on the month, and subsequently ramble on for paragraph after paragraph about how it went, what I felt worked, what I wish I hadn't done, and my celeb crushes. Obviously.
Saturday 4 August 2012
Day Twenty Seven- What. The. F*ck
Weight: 85.1
How the f*ck did that happen? Definately not the way I wanted to be winding down this month. I can only assume overnight I have grown some kind of 700 gram cancerous tumor or something, because I am F*CKED if I know how else that happened. Still, back to the ol' grindstone to try and close out the month in style. Tomorrow is another day, after all.
Rest day tonight, so instead of exercising I think I'll spend the night watching other people be athletic. Sounds like a fair trade to me. I am, however, unsure what to do tomorrow. I would like to do something amazingly active to try and drive some last minute progress, but I am definately a wee bit tired so a proper rest could be better in the long run. To be fair, I think i'll try and 50/50 it and have a fairly out and about kind of day, but without really achieving anything just to make it feel that little bit lazier.
Cheifs are on, so I must bid you all farewell. Not many more of these now, so savour them while they last, or clench your teeth and grit it out for three more days depending on your feelings on the matter; either way, it's almost over!
How the f*ck did that happen? Definately not the way I wanted to be winding down this month. I can only assume overnight I have grown some kind of 700 gram cancerous tumor or something, because I am F*CKED if I know how else that happened. Still, back to the ol' grindstone to try and close out the month in style. Tomorrow is another day, after all.
Rest day tonight, so instead of exercising I think I'll spend the night watching other people be athletic. Sounds like a fair trade to me. I am, however, unsure what to do tomorrow. I would like to do something amazingly active to try and drive some last minute progress, but I am definately a wee bit tired so a proper rest could be better in the long run. To be fair, I think i'll try and 50/50 it and have a fairly out and about kind of day, but without really achieving anything just to make it feel that little bit lazier.
Cheifs are on, so I must bid you all farewell. Not many more of these now, so savour them while they last, or clench your teeth and grit it out for three more days depending on your feelings on the matter; either way, it's almost over!
Friday 3 August 2012
Day Twenty Six- Almost There, Still a Gump
Weight: 84.4kg
Still moving in the right direction... Still a ways to go, so must keep working!
Bit of a story for you; just so you all know how incredibly cool and coordinated I am. So I'm at the gym last night, being a general skuxx, when it occurs to me; things are getting little easy on the cardio side of life. I figure the best way to fix this is to up the incline on the treadmill, thus not only making me a sweaty, sweaty boy, but also improving my skills as a billygoat.
ANYWAY, after my first treadmill session, some weights, and a bit of a bike, I'm ready for the decond round with Captain Treadmill. On I get, all sweaty and meat axe looking and away I go. Full steam ahead, and rather tired, I'm focussing pretty hard on what I'm doing/the sweet LCD screen on the treadmill. Unfortunately, it turns out I'm focusing a little too hard and fail to notice my shoe lace has come undone.
Long story semi short; I stand on my lace, knees lock up, slam down on my elbows/knees and drag my iphone to the floor in the process. Not only do I bail, but ofcourse the machine is still going full tit, so before I know it, I've been fed straight off the back, only to sit there like a dumbass looking up at the girl on the machine next to me. She was kind enough to shoot me a look of pity and condescention before returning to her work out though, so I think we may be best friends.
Hope my pain entertained you all; I must now gym again. Hopefully more successfully than last night...
Still moving in the right direction... Still a ways to go, so must keep working!
Bit of a story for you; just so you all know how incredibly cool and coordinated I am. So I'm at the gym last night, being a general skuxx, when it occurs to me; things are getting little easy on the cardio side of life. I figure the best way to fix this is to up the incline on the treadmill, thus not only making me a sweaty, sweaty boy, but also improving my skills as a billygoat.
ANYWAY, after my first treadmill session, some weights, and a bit of a bike, I'm ready for the decond round with Captain Treadmill. On I get, all sweaty and meat axe looking and away I go. Full steam ahead, and rather tired, I'm focussing pretty hard on what I'm doing/the sweet LCD screen on the treadmill. Unfortunately, it turns out I'm focusing a little too hard and fail to notice my shoe lace has come undone.
Long story semi short; I stand on my lace, knees lock up, slam down on my elbows/knees and drag my iphone to the floor in the process. Not only do I bail, but ofcourse the machine is still going full tit, so before I know it, I've been fed straight off the back, only to sit there like a dumbass looking up at the girl on the machine next to me. She was kind enough to shoot me a look of pity and condescention before returning to her work out though, so I think we may be best friends.
Hope my pain entertained you all; I must now gym again. Hopefully more successfully than last night...
Thursday 2 August 2012
Day Twenty Five- Breakthrough! Huzzah!
Weight: 84.7kg
Finally! F*ck sakes that took longer than I would have liked! Now to continue the march again tomorrow... I suppose gym will be an order, in addition to what can only be described as the most active day of work today ever in my life ever. Hopefully, this combination will result in rippling abs. Probably not though.
So I promised myself I would buy myself a gift if I could manage this month. I was going to wait until after the month was up, but EXACTLY what I wanted as reduced to sh*t today so I purchased it like a boss. I will refrain from using it until I am done... Maybe. Once the month is up I'll throw up a picture so you can all marvel at my pimp reward.
Gym time, 5 days left, HOO-RAH!
Finally! F*ck sakes that took longer than I would have liked! Now to continue the march again tomorrow... I suppose gym will be an order, in addition to what can only be described as the most active day of work today ever in my life ever. Hopefully, this combination will result in rippling abs. Probably not though.
So I promised myself I would buy myself a gift if I could manage this month. I was going to wait until after the month was up, but EXACTLY what I wanted as reduced to sh*t today so I purchased it like a boss. I will refrain from using it until I am done... Maybe. Once the month is up I'll throw up a picture so you can all marvel at my pimp reward.
Gym time, 5 days left, HOO-RAH!
Wednesday 1 August 2012
Day Twenty Four- It's Rest Day, Rest Day, Got to Get Down on Rest Day
Weight: 85.1kg
Well atleast it's movement in the right direction I guess... it would still have been nice to have smashed into the 84's today, but hopefully that will now be reserved for tomorrow, despite a gymless night. Fingers/penises crossed!
I appologise once again for this being a tad later than usual; I see a fair few of you were able to view it last night despite only having bloody knubs to type with as a result of your burrowing for sweet blogginess. I swear I'm trying to get them out on time, but these god damn olympics are just so damned distracting!
Under a week to go now, time for a real push towards the finish! Aparently that's what kiwi rowers do; they sort of take their time for the first while and then play a real good game of catch up right at the end just to really demoralise their oposition... Too bad I started strong and seem to be slowing... Maybe it's time to unscrew the lightbulbs and hit the old P-Train? I hear that gets you thin REAL quick, and gives you that gaunt face I've always wanted...
Well atleast it's movement in the right direction I guess... it would still have been nice to have smashed into the 84's today, but hopefully that will now be reserved for tomorrow, despite a gymless night. Fingers/penises crossed!
I appologise once again for this being a tad later than usual; I see a fair few of you were able to view it last night despite only having bloody knubs to type with as a result of your burrowing for sweet blogginess. I swear I'm trying to get them out on time, but these god damn olympics are just so damned distracting!
Under a week to go now, time for a real push towards the finish! Aparently that's what kiwi rowers do; they sort of take their time for the first while and then play a real good game of catch up right at the end just to really demoralise their oposition... Too bad I started strong and seem to be slowing... Maybe it's time to unscrew the lightbulbs and hit the old P-Train? I hear that gets you thin REAL quick, and gives you that gaunt face I've always wanted...
Tuesday 31 July 2012
Day Twenty Three- Being Lazy Doesn't Make You Lighter- FACT.
Weight: 85.4kg
I f*cking knew sppending the majority of my day sitting on my bum region without peddling anything would come back to bite me. It would have been super pimp to have broken into the 84's today. I suppose that honour will have to wait for now. Sad face.
First of all; sorry this is a little late out. I'm sure there are many of you who have bloodied your fingertips scratching your computer screens, desperately scratching and hoping to dig your way to literary bliss. For that I apologise, but am in no way directly responsible. Please do not sue me.
In more blog-related news, I have upped my game a little at the gym in the last couple of days. The speeds/weights/settings I had been using were starting to get a little easy for my hulk-esque physique, so I bumped sh*t up a notch. I am hoping that this doesn't slow my weight loss, because I have heard that you can end up in some awkward situation where you start building muscle and your weight loss levels out. If that is to happen, atleast people might start mistaking me for Ronnie from Jersey Shore.
I hope the delay didn't cause any fatalities. Tomorrow is rest day, so it'll be on time I swear.
ONE WEEK LEFT B*TCHES!
I f*cking knew sppending the majority of my day sitting on my bum region without peddling anything would come back to bite me. It would have been super pimp to have broken into the 84's today. I suppose that honour will have to wait for now. Sad face.
First of all; sorry this is a little late out. I'm sure there are many of you who have bloodied your fingertips scratching your computer screens, desperately scratching and hoping to dig your way to literary bliss. For that I apologise, but am in no way directly responsible. Please do not sue me.
In more blog-related news, I have upped my game a little at the gym in the last couple of days. The speeds/weights/settings I had been using were starting to get a little easy for my hulk-esque physique, so I bumped sh*t up a notch. I am hoping that this doesn't slow my weight loss, because I have heard that you can end up in some awkward situation where you start building muscle and your weight loss levels out. If that is to happen, atleast people might start mistaking me for Ronnie from Jersey Shore.
I hope the delay didn't cause any fatalities. Tomorrow is rest day, so it'll be on time I swear.
ONE WEEK LEFT B*TCHES!
Monday 30 July 2012
Day Twenty Two- Running Out of Time
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| Manliest dude you have ever seen... on a blog written by me... |
Weight: 85.0kg
Loss For The Week: 1.6kg
Overall Loss: 8.1kg
Yayuh! Now if I can just keep it up over the final stretch, shit should start to look pretty impressive by the end of the month.
A pretty sedentry day today is probably going to result in a gain, which is sad news. I did go balls out at the gym, so hopefully that will have counteracted my laziness atleast a smidge. Smidge? Ugh, that word sucks.
Only eight days left now, and I'm starting to worry about how much I am going to be able to achieve in that short space of time. I would still like to be even more man dime related, but I don't think I'll quite be where I would like to be by then. Not that I had ever expected to turn things around THAT dramatically in a month, but the more mediocre success I have, the more I want. I may have a gambling addiction?
Gyming early in the evening is way more boss than going at like 10.30 every god damn night. I think it's about time I started taking my gear to work and going on my way home, that way I wont have to go to bed absolutely smashed every night, and I will have way more time for activities due to the reduced travel time. SUCCESS!
Sunday 29 July 2012
Day Twenty One- ...And He Recovers!
Weight: 85.4kg
I'm pretty glad to have dropped again... mainly because I titled that last post hoping to follow it with the title of this post. I suppose it would have been a bit awkward if I had gone up... I suppose I would have had to title it "... And Falls Flat on His Face". Esh, glad that was avoided.
Another weekend gone, once again handled like a boss. This is getting easier and easier to maintain which is sensational. Just to totally contradict myself there, I am starting to really crave some delicious pizza. Given how well the month seems to be going I'm probably going to hold off the takeaways for a wee bit longer, maybe try achieve something a little more impressive, so the fact that I've decided to postpone my return to the world of delicious food and pantsless nights has me all upset on the inside.
Bonus information: I had a look through My Fitness Pal (The app I use to track my progress and calorie intake), and noticed that when I started using it waaaaay back in November 2011, I clocked in at a not so impressive 102kg. Pretty sure I was never that huge, but the numbers suggest otherwise. hideously unkeen to descend back into that state, so lets hope this hard work sticks!
I'm pretty glad to have dropped again... mainly because I titled that last post hoping to follow it with the title of this post. I suppose it would have been a bit awkward if I had gone up... I suppose I would have had to title it "... And Falls Flat on His Face". Esh, glad that was avoided.
Another weekend gone, once again handled like a boss. This is getting easier and easier to maintain which is sensational. Just to totally contradict myself there, I am starting to really crave some delicious pizza. Given how well the month seems to be going I'm probably going to hold off the takeaways for a wee bit longer, maybe try achieve something a little more impressive, so the fact that I've decided to postpone my return to the world of delicious food and pantsless nights has me all upset on the inside.
Bonus information: I had a look through My Fitness Pal (The app I use to track my progress and calorie intake), and noticed that when I started using it waaaaay back in November 2011, I clocked in at a not so impressive 102kg. Pretty sure I was never that huge, but the numbers suggest otherwise. hideously unkeen to descend back into that state, so lets hope this hard work sticks!
Saturday 28 July 2012
Day Twenty- He Stumbles...
Weight: 86.4kg
A minor slip up, yes, but luckily instead of being a whiney b*tch about it, my mentality at the moment is all "THIS. IS. SPARTA!" as far as weight loss is concerned, so instead I view this result as a declaration of war on behalf of nature. And the Germans... but we'll start with nature, the Germans have it rough enough.
A town trip tonight sounded absolutely sensational to be honest, and it took all the self control I could muster (along with the hideously cold weather) to keep me in doors. A hard day at the office will do that to you, but hopefully it was also an active day and thus tomorrows result will have a brother back on track and attempting to rap the lyrics to "Who Gon' Stop Me?"
Late gym after the warriors tonight seeing as Batman had my attention last night, so I'll be going guns a-blazing to get this love boat back on course. HOO-RAH!
A minor slip up, yes, but luckily instead of being a whiney b*tch about it, my mentality at the moment is all "THIS. IS. SPARTA!" as far as weight loss is concerned, so instead I view this result as a declaration of war on behalf of nature. And the Germans... but we'll start with nature, the Germans have it rough enough.
A town trip tonight sounded absolutely sensational to be honest, and it took all the self control I could muster (along with the hideously cold weather) to keep me in doors. A hard day at the office will do that to you, but hopefully it was also an active day and thus tomorrows result will have a brother back on track and attempting to rap the lyrics to "Who Gon' Stop Me?"
Late gym after the warriors tonight seeing as Batman had my attention last night, so I'll be going guns a-blazing to get this love boat back on course. HOO-RAH!
Friday 27 July 2012
Day Nineteen- Crunch Time
Weight: 85.9kg
You see that number up there? The one that starts with 8, and is followed by a 5? It's causing boners all over the show. Just that skuxx. Still heeeeaaaaaps to go, but so close to a sweet, sweet milestone that shit's getting a little exciting.
So I added crunches to my workout regime last night. Let me tell you, worst idea ever. The human body is not a deck chair, and thus is not supposed to fold in that manner. My abdominals will tell you this.
Also, I wish they were called abominables.
Off to see my boi (Yeah, I spell like a 13 year old girl, wanna fight about it?) Batman tonight. Word on the street is it's 3 hours of some rich dude in bondage gear beating up bad guys. Usually the only cinemas showing that sort of sh*t are located out the back of erotica stores all over K Road.
I am, however, a little upset. You know what makes a good movie? Action? Hilarity? No. The answer is popcorn.
Popcorn is delicious, and a key part of the movie going experience, yet just oh so bad for my decreasing tum tum. Fuck you, nature. Why must all delicious things be so bad for me? Boys just want to have fu-un!
You see that number up there? The one that starts with 8, and is followed by a 5? It's causing boners all over the show. Just that skuxx. Still heeeeaaaaaps to go, but so close to a sweet, sweet milestone that shit's getting a little exciting.
So I added crunches to my workout regime last night. Let me tell you, worst idea ever. The human body is not a deck chair, and thus is not supposed to fold in that manner. My abdominals will tell you this.
Also, I wish they were called abominables.
Off to see my boi (Yeah, I spell like a 13 year old girl, wanna fight about it?) Batman tonight. Word on the street is it's 3 hours of some rich dude in bondage gear beating up bad guys. Usually the only cinemas showing that sort of sh*t are located out the back of erotica stores all over K Road.
I am, however, a little upset. You know what makes a good movie? Action? Hilarity? No. The answer is popcorn.
Popcorn is delicious, and a key part of the movie going experience, yet just oh so bad for my decreasing tum tum. Fuck you, nature. Why must all delicious things be so bad for me? Boys just want to have fu-un!
Thursday 26 July 2012
Day Eighteen- Gym Class Hero Up in Hur!
Weight: 86.2kg
So, SO close! I'm telling you right now, when I hit the 85's I'll be sporting wood all up in this b*tch.
Back to gyming tonight which should be super pimp. My question is, at what stage do I increase my weight work and level out my cardio? I'm all for being a much smaller man-dime, but I dont want to lose to girls at manly things like arm wrestles and trucks.
Also, how is my alcohol tollerance going to be after all this? Not only have I taken a full months hiatus from being fun, but I'm pretty sure being a smaller boy is going to result in a reduced number of beverages per pantsless night.
I am genuinly concerned about this! I have few skills in this world, and being fun at parties was one of my better ones. Am I doomed to a life of weakness when it comes to drinking? I... I don't know... Atleast my first night back on the fermented dragon should be interesting...
So, SO close! I'm telling you right now, when I hit the 85's I'll be sporting wood all up in this b*tch.
Back to gyming tonight which should be super pimp. My question is, at what stage do I increase my weight work and level out my cardio? I'm all for being a much smaller man-dime, but I dont want to lose to girls at manly things like arm wrestles and trucks.
Also, how is my alcohol tollerance going to be after all this? Not only have I taken a full months hiatus from being fun, but I'm pretty sure being a smaller boy is going to result in a reduced number of beverages per pantsless night.
I am genuinly concerned about this! I have few skills in this world, and being fun at parties was one of my better ones. Am I doomed to a life of weakness when it comes to drinking? I... I don't know... Atleast my first night back on the fermented dragon should be interesting...
Wednesday 25 July 2012
Day Seventeen- Back on Track... Again
Weight: 86.5kg.
And so it begins. Gone are the days of easy losses and rapid success, and now we welcome the new guard; pain, frustration, and extended periods of time spent in rooms full of excercise equipment and muscular Indians.
Taking the night off the gym tonight, mainly because (as any of you who happen to be my friend on Facebook will have seen) I. Am. F*cked. Definately going to have to start implimenting a rest day every Wednesday, I just don't think my adonis frame is ready for 4-5 straight days of intense exercise yet.
You know who has exercise down? That dog who runs in it's sleep. Other than the running face first into the wall part, that fluffy bastard has it down. He's burning calories without even trying! Without even trying to try! Infact, he's probably dreaming about being Sonic the Hedgehog or chasing cars or sniffing butts, lying there in perfect bliss, all the while morphing into a dog faced kcikboxing adonis.
Lucky dog. F*ck you, and your sleep exercise. Teach me your ways.
And so it begins. Gone are the days of easy losses and rapid success, and now we welcome the new guard; pain, frustration, and extended periods of time spent in rooms full of excercise equipment and muscular Indians.
Taking the night off the gym tonight, mainly because (as any of you who happen to be my friend on Facebook will have seen) I. Am. F*cked. Definately going to have to start implimenting a rest day every Wednesday, I just don't think my adonis frame is ready for 4-5 straight days of intense exercise yet.
You know who has exercise down? That dog who runs in it's sleep. Other than the running face first into the wall part, that fluffy bastard has it down. He's burning calories without even trying! Without even trying to try! Infact, he's probably dreaming about being Sonic the Hedgehog or chasing cars or sniffing butts, lying there in perfect bliss, all the while morphing into a dog faced kcikboxing adonis.
Lucky dog. F*ck you, and your sleep exercise. Teach me your ways.
Tuesday 24 July 2012
Day Sixteen- Over The Hump... Haha, Hump.
Weight: 86.7kg
Damn it. Still better than I had expected over the last weekend though, so back to progress as of tomorrow. Or atleast thats the plan.
I think the main concern at this point is how much of a dime I may become with fourteen days to go. What if I end up too dime related, and I lose all of my friends because my unnecessarily good looks threaten everyone? This is a key concern for the aspiring man-dime.
Dimeness aside, I am keeping things in perspective. At the end of the day, I've spent just over two weeks being healthier than normal. It's not a long time, and it hasn't been the world's most dramatic change, so the test will be keeping it going and continuing my sweet progress until we no longer need a washboard at the flat as you can just use my abs.
Anyway, Geordie is on once again. Time to watch my fellow man-dimes before gym time.
BYE!
Damn it. Still better than I had expected over the last weekend though, so back to progress as of tomorrow. Or atleast thats the plan.
I think the main concern at this point is how much of a dime I may become with fourteen days to go. What if I end up too dime related, and I lose all of my friends because my unnecessarily good looks threaten everyone? This is a key concern for the aspiring man-dime.
Dimeness aside, I am keeping things in perspective. At the end of the day, I've spent just over two weeks being healthier than normal. It's not a long time, and it hasn't been the world's most dramatic change, so the test will be keeping it going and continuing my sweet progress until we no longer need a washboard at the flat as you can just use my abs.
Anyway, Geordie is on once again. Time to watch my fellow man-dimes before gym time.
BYE!
Monday 23 July 2012
Day Fifteen- WOOOAAAH We're Half Way There!
 |
| One Grey Gentleman |
Weight: 86.6kg
Week's Loss: 3.1kg
Overall Loss: 6.5kg
Still on track like a sweet fitness boss.
So we're half way there. How am I feeling? Do I want fried chicken real bad? Where is the pancake mix? Well, friends, I will tell you.
I am finding it much easier than I would have expected. In all fairness, prior to this endevour, I cooked once a week, max. Thus far, I've cooked every night, and even stepped outside the safe zone of stir frys and toast a couple of times. I know, it's a little selfish. The people at Mcdonalds, Burger King, and Green Jade Takeaways are potentially struggling financially thanks to my personal quest, but sometimes you just have to think about yourself instead of others.
Takeaways are no longer as appealing either. Seeing as I've put in so much time, and dedicated funds to vegetables instead of vodka, I feel like it would be a waste of my own efforts to give it up now. Don't get me wrong, at the end of this month I still plan on having takeaways from time to time, but I have zero interest in reverting back to the lazy, money wasting bastard who started this.
Writing this thing has also been super helpful. Updating this, knowing that people who know me, and complete strangers alike are reading it have helped me to stay focused, which is a bonus seeing as I'm probably the laziest person I know, and sleeping and eating deep fried objects works in oh-so well with my lifestyle. Wanna achieve something? Put yourself in a position where other people can judge the sh*t out of you; works wonders!
Anyway, you've read 14 of these already, I doubt you need this to take up too much more of your evening. Thanks for holding a brother accountable for the past 15 days; hopefully you decide to hang around for another 15!
Chur again y'all!
Sunday 22 July 2012
Day Fourteen- Rain = Unhelpful to an Aspiring Skuxx
Weight: 86.9
Yayuh, into the 86's. Seeing that number go down again was my sh*t this morning, it's like I'm winning at something, except I don't know who I'm playing against...
Of concern, however, is that the rate at which that number is decreasing is shrinking with every passing day. I don't know how much more extreme I can be here, man! I don't really want to reduce my food intake anymore, because it's all pretty good food and I think much less would make me a weak little b*tch. And then I'll lose all the arm wrestles I compete in, which would just be unacceptable. Also, I could up my gyming, but I am unsure how my body would feel about that. Maybe I should convert my room into a sweet sauna, invite a couple of guys from the RSA, and get my sweat on?
Half way point tomorrow, and I'm feeling pretty good. Not missing delicious deep fried objects as much as expected, and staying home last night was a piece of cake. Speaking of which, a girl offered me a brownie last night, guess who turned that sh*t DOWN! That would be me. What a boss, right? Will power bigger than my willy right hur.
I would imagine I will have made a bit of a gain again this weekend, as it was too wet to go outside and play, and sushi for lunch meant ample carbs, but I got out and about and tried to be atleast semi active, so hopefully it's atleast reduced from last time.
There will be another photo in tomorrows post for all of my readers who must sit down when peeing, so be sure to tune in (Views have so far been higher on days where my sweet temple is on display, coincidence? I think not). I'll probably do some kind of half way run down so expect a little more length, alot more self indulgence, and probably some b*tching about the negative progress I'm semi expecting.
BYE!
Yayuh, into the 86's. Seeing that number go down again was my sh*t this morning, it's like I'm winning at something, except I don't know who I'm playing against...
Of concern, however, is that the rate at which that number is decreasing is shrinking with every passing day. I don't know how much more extreme I can be here, man! I don't really want to reduce my food intake anymore, because it's all pretty good food and I think much less would make me a weak little b*tch. And then I'll lose all the arm wrestles I compete in, which would just be unacceptable. Also, I could up my gyming, but I am unsure how my body would feel about that. Maybe I should convert my room into a sweet sauna, invite a couple of guys from the RSA, and get my sweat on?
Half way point tomorrow, and I'm feeling pretty good. Not missing delicious deep fried objects as much as expected, and staying home last night was a piece of cake. Speaking of which, a girl offered me a brownie last night, guess who turned that sh*t DOWN! That would be me. What a boss, right? Will power bigger than my willy right hur.
I would imagine I will have made a bit of a gain again this weekend, as it was too wet to go outside and play, and sushi for lunch meant ample carbs, but I got out and about and tried to be atleast semi active, so hopefully it's atleast reduced from last time.
There will be another photo in tomorrows post for all of my readers who must sit down when peeing, so be sure to tune in (Views have so far been higher on days where my sweet temple is on display, coincidence? I think not). I'll probably do some kind of half way run down so expect a little more length, alot more self indulgence, and probably some b*tching about the negative progress I'm semi expecting.
BYE!
Saturday 21 July 2012
Day Thirteen- Another Weekend up in my Grill
Weight: 87.1kg
More movement in the right direction. I swear if I smash the 86's tomorrow I'll crack a serious amount of trouser lumber. This probably wont happen due to my lack of gym and a fairly relaxed day at work, but we'll try for it regardless. Hopefully I can avoid to little bit of regression last weekend brought with it, and continue my march toward skuxxdom, only time will tell.
This weekend presents itself SO much more amicably than the last. Instead of being all up in my face, taunting me, reminding me how much I appreciate drunk happenings, it presents me with a lovely break from the trial of being a working menz day in, day out. I'm more excited about gaming and doing something activity related tomorrow than I would have been had drinking been on the cards. That can't be right, can it?
Anyway, warriors are on and they are sucking. Tune in next time for more pointless ramblings and whining about sweet, sweet problems of the first world variety!
More movement in the right direction. I swear if I smash the 86's tomorrow I'll crack a serious amount of trouser lumber. This probably wont happen due to my lack of gym and a fairly relaxed day at work, but we'll try for it regardless. Hopefully I can avoid to little bit of regression last weekend brought with it, and continue my march toward skuxxdom, only time will tell.
This weekend presents itself SO much more amicably than the last. Instead of being all up in my face, taunting me, reminding me how much I appreciate drunk happenings, it presents me with a lovely break from the trial of being a working menz day in, day out. I'm more excited about gaming and doing something activity related tomorrow than I would have been had drinking been on the cards. That can't be right, can it?
Anyway, warriors are on and they are sucking. Tune in next time for more pointless ramblings and whining about sweet, sweet problems of the first world variety!
Friday 20 July 2012
Day Twelve- Still Motivated
Weight: 87.8kg
YUS! I had been so keen to break into the 87's, I may or may not have become aroused in the pants region when it showed up on the scales this morning. Is that wierd? Nah, it's not, f*ck you.
Progress is great for a couple of reasons; obviously it's pimp because it's another step towards being a skuxx dripping in money and hoes, but more importantly, it keeps you focused and motivated. It's pretty easy to become disenchanted with the whole thing when you're not getting anywhere, but when your moving forward, even if it is in tiny baby cat steps, you want to keep going so the progress doesn't dry up.
No gym tonight; have been every night this week, and I sort of feel like my body would appreciate a bit of a break. Especially since im still nursing a sore elbow I havn't taken to time to rest and heal yet (Because I'm manly as like Rambo with less guns and better head bands). Also, I realise that pretty much directly contradicts what I just said above about being motivated, but I heard somewhere you're not meant to gym every night of the week otherwise your body has no time to recover. Plus I'm le tired.
Note: I am writing this while The Voice is on TV in the same room. I would like to make it clear that Delta Goodram (Haha, good ram. See what I did there?) looks heaps like a giant praying mantis. That is all.
YUS! I had been so keen to break into the 87's, I may or may not have become aroused in the pants region when it showed up on the scales this morning. Is that wierd? Nah, it's not, f*ck you.
Progress is great for a couple of reasons; obviously it's pimp because it's another step towards being a skuxx dripping in money and hoes, but more importantly, it keeps you focused and motivated. It's pretty easy to become disenchanted with the whole thing when you're not getting anywhere, but when your moving forward, even if it is in tiny baby cat steps, you want to keep going so the progress doesn't dry up.
No gym tonight; have been every night this week, and I sort of feel like my body would appreciate a bit of a break. Especially since im still nursing a sore elbow I havn't taken to time to rest and heal yet (Because I'm manly as like Rambo with less guns and better head bands). Also, I realise that pretty much directly contradicts what I just said above about being motivated, but I heard somewhere you're not meant to gym every night of the week otherwise your body has no time to recover. Plus I'm le tired.
Note: I am writing this while The Voice is on TV in the same room. I would like to make it clear that Delta Goodram (Haha, good ram. See what I did there?) looks heaps like a giant praying mantis. That is all.
Thursday 19 July 2012
Day Eleven- Slow And Steady Wins The Race
Weight: 88.1kg
So it's only .1kg, atleast it's movement in the right direction, right? I'm sure I read some sh*t about a fast as rabbit getting beaten by a tortoise with down syndrome... I am unsure.
One thing I have noticed, is that every day I've gone either up, or dropped minimally in weight, I've smashed back some carb related goodness the day before. Moral of the story? Carbs are bad, mmmkay?
PROGRESS on the weekend activities front though! I'm thinking I'll go throw a ball around or some sheet. Nice and easy, requires max one other person and doesn't require all too much skill on my part. Perfect! Either that, or hire a smoke machine for my bedroom, hit the party pills and rave it up for a day. It's a definate coin toss. Obviously, I'm not overly creative when it comes to new ways to improve performance at this; so I put it to YOU; the people reading this self involved rant: Delicious things a retarded cook such as myself could potentially make instead of GOD DAMN STIR FRYS! GO!
So it's only .1kg, atleast it's movement in the right direction, right? I'm sure I read some sh*t about a fast as rabbit getting beaten by a tortoise with down syndrome... I am unsure.
One thing I have noticed, is that every day I've gone either up, or dropped minimally in weight, I've smashed back some carb related goodness the day before. Moral of the story? Carbs are bad, mmmkay?
PROGRESS on the weekend activities front though! I'm thinking I'll go throw a ball around or some sheet. Nice and easy, requires max one other person and doesn't require all too much skill on my part. Perfect! Either that, or hire a smoke machine for my bedroom, hit the party pills and rave it up for a day. It's a definate coin toss. Obviously, I'm not overly creative when it comes to new ways to improve performance at this; so I put it to YOU; the people reading this self involved rant: Delicious things a retarded cook such as myself could potentially make instead of GOD DAMN STIR FRYS! GO!
Wednesday 18 July 2012
Day Ten- Back on Track
Weight: 88.2kg
FINALLY! Turns out doing physical activities does wonders for burning calories. Now all I have to do is keep being an active individual, and I'll be jacked to f*ck in no time.
Perhaps I should take up a weekend sport to avoid being a crazy cat lady (sans vagina, ofcourse) every weekend. Surely healthy people don't just hide inside all weekend because they aren't out spending their hard earned moneys (thats right, plural) on booze and door charges. The thing is, I have no interest in climbing rocks or walking pansy ass bush tracks. Aren't there sweet social sports teams or something? Maybe I should look into this.
OR, I could just spend all day at the gym striking up conversations with muscular indians? I have always wanted to be part of that popular group, all huddled around the weights for hours on end, flexing their indian biceps and complimenting each other on their physique.
^^ All of that, sarcasm. Just so we are clear. I have no interest in being a muscular indian. I hate that text doesn't convey sarcasm so, SO much. I'm glad we cleared that up. Choice.
Also, turns out that sounded like a wee bit of a racist rant. It was not. My issue is with the flexing and the general conduct of said indians; not so much that they are indian in the first place. Thats just how the situation happens to have played out. Leave me alone, man!
FINALLY! Turns out doing physical activities does wonders for burning calories. Now all I have to do is keep being an active individual, and I'll be jacked to f*ck in no time.
Perhaps I should take up a weekend sport to avoid being a crazy cat lady (sans vagina, ofcourse) every weekend. Surely healthy people don't just hide inside all weekend because they aren't out spending their hard earned moneys (thats right, plural) on booze and door charges. The thing is, I have no interest in climbing rocks or walking pansy ass bush tracks. Aren't there sweet social sports teams or something? Maybe I should look into this.
OR, I could just spend all day at the gym striking up conversations with muscular indians? I have always wanted to be part of that popular group, all huddled around the weights for hours on end, flexing their indian biceps and complimenting each other on their physique.
^^ All of that, sarcasm. Just so we are clear. I have no interest in being a muscular indian. I hate that text doesn't convey sarcasm so, SO much. I'm glad we cleared that up. Choice.
Also, turns out that sounded like a wee bit of a racist rant. It was not. My issue is with the flexing and the general conduct of said indians; not so much that they are indian in the first place. Thats just how the situation happens to have played out. Leave me alone, man!
Tuesday 17 July 2012
Day Nine- Back to Being a Working Menz
Weight: 89.7
God damn it, up another .2kg. WHAT THE F*CK IS GOING ON?!
I kid, I kid. A weekend of sitting around the house and minimal gyming can be expected to slow progress. Back to work today though which meant walking around all day like the stellar sales individual I am, taking stuff to people's cars, and generally being an active dude.
Also, gym to come tonight so that should help get this train back on the fitness tracks.
Also of note, since I began this just over a week ago, I've saved so much money, I may just have to take it all out of the bank on my return to a night on the town, climb the rafters, and make it rain rapper style. But only if I take it out in dollar coins. Actually, I don't think that's the best idea. The point is, not buying delicious takeaways all the time could make me a billionare by christmas, and I could really do with being a billionare.
Gym time! (right after Geordie Shore)
God damn it, up another .2kg. WHAT THE F*CK IS GOING ON?!
I kid, I kid. A weekend of sitting around the house and minimal gyming can be expected to slow progress. Back to work today though which meant walking around all day like the stellar sales individual I am, taking stuff to people's cars, and generally being an active dude.
Also, gym to come tonight so that should help get this train back on the fitness tracks.
Also of note, since I began this just over a week ago, I've saved so much money, I may just have to take it all out of the bank on my return to a night on the town, climb the rafters, and make it rain rapper style. But only if I take it out in dollar coins. Actually, I don't think that's the best idea. The point is, not buying delicious takeaways all the time could make me a billionare by christmas, and I could really do with being a billionare.
Gym time! (right after Geordie Shore)
Monday 16 July 2012
Day Eight- A Week in Review
 | |
| Post Gym Kyle being a skuxx of the delux variety |
Loss For The Week: 3.6kg
Alright, before we panic, I have a couple of theories regarding this turn around in progression. Firstly, I weighed myself a little later today as I had the day off, thus it was warmer... So my cold vs willy theory is still intact. Secondly. the manly beard I'm sporting is one day manlier than last week, and thats gotta weigh like 3kg.
Seriously though, the day was spent sitting around playing xbox, and while my eating was still pretty good, I had more carbs than usual yesterday, and didn't quite get my six meals. On top of all that, I had been expecting things to flatten out sometime soon, so no surprises really.
Moving right along, overall I'm fairly happy with the way this first week went. Despite my incessent bitching, it wasn't as hard as I had thought to avoid deep fried objects and turn down a night in the mighty AK. It's still a drop for the week, so thats nice.
It would be nice if my god damn gym wasn't packed when I wanted to go today, so I could have pumped some more iron and had rippling biceps for you all to marvel at, but alas.
Also of benefit, and believe me, this is probably the first time I have ever uttered these words in a positive light; I have work tomorrow. It's positive because it'll mean back to my meal routine, moving around all day, being active like a cool as fox... who sells electronic equipment... and, you know, they pay me to be there which is always nice.
Alright, all done. I didn't want this to be too long winded, so it would fit nicely between TV shows if you wanted to read it in the ads. I'm a real thoughtful guy like that.
Sunday 15 July 2012
Day Seven- Survived The Weekend!
Weight: 88.8
Sooooo for the first 20 mins or so yesterdays post was reading the wrong weight... Plus side; I've continued in the right direction (all be it at a slower rate), the down side; I'm not quite as far along as anyone who may have caught it that quickly would have thought. Sorry peeps!
So made it through the weekend without getting pantsless drunk because I'm a boss. Even pretty glad, as it turns out last night was rather drama related. As a result, I woke up this morning while the sun was still up, had a productive day of washing and gaming, and am now about to venture off for another delightful gym related adventure.
On another positive note, I managed to remember to defrost some chicken for dinner, so I FINALLY managed to injest something that doesn't grow out of the dirt. I can only assume the extra protein will result in my body transforming into a muscular, hulking mass come morning, but I'll take dropping a few more grams and not having to shave due to having mondays off work.
Anywho, bit of a heads up for y'all; tomorrows post may be a little longer as I'll try review the first week of being the healthiest dude alive. It will also have pictures, which I'm sure those of you who enjoy the musings of Hugh Hefner will enjoy. Not because I'll be naked, but because you wont have to read as much. I can be naked if you want, but I'll leave that to public demand.
Chur!
Sooooo for the first 20 mins or so yesterdays post was reading the wrong weight... Plus side; I've continued in the right direction (all be it at a slower rate), the down side; I'm not quite as far along as anyone who may have caught it that quickly would have thought. Sorry peeps!
So made it through the weekend without getting pantsless drunk because I'm a boss. Even pretty glad, as it turns out last night was rather drama related. As a result, I woke up this morning while the sun was still up, had a productive day of washing and gaming, and am now about to venture off for another delightful gym related adventure.
On another positive note, I managed to remember to defrost some chicken for dinner, so I FINALLY managed to injest something that doesn't grow out of the dirt. I can only assume the extra protein will result in my body transforming into a muscular, hulking mass come morning, but I'll take dropping a few more grams and not having to shave due to having mondays off work.
Anywho, bit of a heads up for y'all; tomorrows post may be a little longer as I'll try review the first week of being the healthiest dude alive. It will also have pictures, which I'm sure those of you who enjoy the musings of Hugh Hefner will enjoy. Not because I'll be naked, but because you wont have to read as much. I can be naked if you want, but I'll leave that to public demand.
Chur!
Saturday 14 July 2012
Day Six- Trial By Fire... Or Beer...
Weight: 89.2
So as of this morning, the number the scales shows me when I stand on them is the lowest it's been since I was a pimply faced, furry moustached high schooler. F*ckin' tops. Sometime soon it should slow down, but hopefully I can keep it moving in the correct direction.
Problem is, all I want to do tonight is get drunk, fist pump like a champion, and potentially take my pants off somewhere. The lads are having beers, soon to head to town and live it up, and here I am, writing this, eating my stir fry and patting the furry bastard cat. GREAT!
I suppose this way the chances of someone seeing my willy are lower, which is probably a benefit. But conversely, the number of people seeing my sweet dance moves is also reduced. A definate issue, not only for myself, but the general public.
Ahwell, it's only four weekends. Four. Long. Weekends. I need a hobby? Do people still do puzzles? Maybe I could train and become world Jenga champion? I just don't know. Atleast instead of feeling like a sweaty, spewy, disgusting mess, I'll feel like a boss related pimp skuxx in the morning. Yayuh.
So as of this morning, the number the scales shows me when I stand on them is the lowest it's been since I was a pimply faced, furry moustached high schooler. F*ckin' tops. Sometime soon it should slow down, but hopefully I can keep it moving in the correct direction.
Problem is, all I want to do tonight is get drunk, fist pump like a champion, and potentially take my pants off somewhere. The lads are having beers, soon to head to town and live it up, and here I am, writing this, eating my stir fry and patting the furry bastard cat. GREAT!
I suppose this way the chances of someone seeing my willy are lower, which is probably a benefit. But conversely, the number of people seeing my sweet dance moves is also reduced. A definate issue, not only for myself, but the general public.
Ahwell, it's only four weekends. Four. Long. Weekends. I need a hobby? Do people still do puzzles? Maybe I could train and become world Jenga champion? I just don't know. Atleast instead of feeling like a sweaty, spewy, disgusting mess, I'll feel like a boss related pimp skuxx in the morning. Yayuh.
Friday 13 July 2012
Day Five- Mo' F*ckin' Friday Yo!
Weight: 90.4
F*ckin' Friday b*tches! Weekends are definately the part of the week that makes working worth while. All that pain, getting up early, being somewhere for 8+ that isn't bed pays off and I can use the money I've earned to turn myself temporarily into a slurry (yet remarkably entertaining) mess....
Not so much this month. I knew going in this would be one of the harder parts to cope with. Incase you havn't noticed; I like to party. And I'm generally fairly good at it. What do people who don't drink do on their Saturday nights? I guess I could become a full on geek and live in/on my Xbox for the next wee while? Or take up a sweet hobby, like model planes or stalking strange women I meet in the supermarket... Probably not so much the latter... I feel like that may be more trouble than it's worth. Plus I always sucked at hide and go seek.
None the less, this entire month I will strive not to get too rowdy, and this weekend will be the first test. Here's hoping I pass.
P.S. I was ment to include a photo of me being a gym related person in this post, but I failed in acquiring an acceptable picture. I.e. a picture of me, in the gym, without the presence of muscular indian gentlemen. I will attempt again tonight and include in tomorrow's post.
F*ckin' Friday b*tches! Weekends are definately the part of the week that makes working worth while. All that pain, getting up early, being somewhere for 8+ that isn't bed pays off and I can use the money I've earned to turn myself temporarily into a slurry (yet remarkably entertaining) mess....
Not so much this month. I knew going in this would be one of the harder parts to cope with. Incase you havn't noticed; I like to party. And I'm generally fairly good at it. What do people who don't drink do on their Saturday nights? I guess I could become a full on geek and live in/on my Xbox for the next wee while? Or take up a sweet hobby, like model planes or stalking strange women I meet in the supermarket... Probably not so much the latter... I feel like that may be more trouble than it's worth. Plus I always sucked at hide and go seek.
None the less, this entire month I will strive not to get too rowdy, and this weekend will be the first test. Here's hoping I pass.
P.S. I was ment to include a photo of me being a gym related person in this post, but I failed in acquiring an acceptable picture. I.e. a picture of me, in the gym, without the presence of muscular indian gentlemen. I will attempt again tonight and include in tomorrow's post.
Thursday 12 July 2012
Day Four- It's Not All Hunger And Moping
Weight: 91.1
Firstly, I'm a little unsure about the weight figures so far. I'm guessing they're dropping fairly quickly because I went on a Super Size Me-esque binge the weekend before I began this (like a real winner), and am now readjusting to normal food consumption. That, or I'm weighing myself in the morning when it's cold and my willy is smaller. That could be it.
ANYWEIGH (see what I did there?), I definately love takeaways. I'm guessing I made that pretty clear in the bitch sesh from yesterday, but you know what else is f*cking dericious? F*cking pears. I was sceptical, but that sh*t is LOVELY. Potentially the best fruit, outside of melon related objects, obviously. (No inuendo intended).
Also, cooking isn't as horrible as I remember. Admittedly, I've only been making stir frys, which most one armed, near sighted children could handle, but I could pretty much live off the deliciousness they provide my tummy with.
Gym time now, didn't go last night as I managed to hurt my ankle in boss related fashion on tuesday night so I'll pump iron Arnie style tonight.
Chur!
Firstly, I'm a little unsure about the weight figures so far. I'm guessing they're dropping fairly quickly because I went on a Super Size Me-esque binge the weekend before I began this (like a real winner), and am now readjusting to normal food consumption. That, or I'm weighing myself in the morning when it's cold and my willy is smaller. That could be it.
ANYWEIGH (see what I did there?), I definately love takeaways. I'm guessing I made that pretty clear in the bitch sesh from yesterday, but you know what else is f*cking dericious? F*cking pears. I was sceptical, but that sh*t is LOVELY. Potentially the best fruit, outside of melon related objects, obviously. (No inuendo intended).
Also, cooking isn't as horrible as I remember. Admittedly, I've only been making stir frys, which most one armed, near sighted children could handle, but I could pretty much live off the deliciousness they provide my tummy with.
Gym time now, didn't go last night as I managed to hurt my ankle in boss related fashion on tuesday night so I'll pump iron Arnie style tonight.
Chur!
Wednesday 11 July 2012
Day Three- Know Your Enemy
Weight: 92.3
So it was the first gym sesh under the new regime last night, and I realised something: Sh*t is going to be alot harder this month if my troll brain refuses to co-operate. Pretty much forgot everything I could possibly need for a productive workout, and then hurt both my ankle and elbow while working out. What a winner, right?
The thing is, there are very few things I genuinely love in this life, but it seems every, single one of them is contradictory to what I'm trying to achieve here.
You want an example? I'll give you an example; You know what's delicious? McDonalds. And KFC. And Burger King. You know what none of those things are? Healthy. Yet there they are, being all delicious and easy. Shot, America, this one is all on you, you lazy bastards. I'll stick to my stir fry and fruit like a bawse thank you.
What's warmer, more comfortable, and (once again) easier than getting up early for breakfast? Lying in bed until the absolute last minute and then bitching about having to wait until work for cereal. This one can probably be attributed to Winter being a cold, heartless harlot, but hating winter doesn't warm my god damn nipples.
UGH, anyway, enough whining. Troll brain will come on board eventually, good things take time. Unlike things that arent good for you. Which take far less time. And are delicious. And easier. Damn.
So it was the first gym sesh under the new regime last night, and I realised something: Sh*t is going to be alot harder this month if my troll brain refuses to co-operate. Pretty much forgot everything I could possibly need for a productive workout, and then hurt both my ankle and elbow while working out. What a winner, right?
The thing is, there are very few things I genuinely love in this life, but it seems every, single one of them is contradictory to what I'm trying to achieve here.
You want an example? I'll give you an example; You know what's delicious? McDonalds. And KFC. And Burger King. You know what none of those things are? Healthy. Yet there they are, being all delicious and easy. Shot, America, this one is all on you, you lazy bastards. I'll stick to my stir fry and fruit like a bawse thank you.
What's warmer, more comfortable, and (once again) easier than getting up early for breakfast? Lying in bed until the absolute last minute and then bitching about having to wait until work for cereal. This one can probably be attributed to Winter being a cold, heartless harlot, but hating winter doesn't warm my god damn nipples.
UGH, anyway, enough whining. Troll brain will come on board eventually, good things take time. Unlike things that arent good for you. Which take far less time. And are delicious. And easier. Damn.
Tuesday 10 July 2012
Day Two- Sh*t is Getting REAL
Weight: 93.1kg
So my estimate yesterday was a little off, weighed myself thismorning and found that im actually 93.1kg of man-ness. Not too fussed, just a little more work to do I suppose.
Eating today has been pretty sweet, havn't quite started the cold sweats one gets from prolonged Burger King withdrawl which was positive.
Also, I purchased some suppliments last night at like 10.30pm from bodybuilding.co.nz (I know, makes me sound like I think I'm a Hercules). Why do you care, you ask? Because the website is balls out easy to use, they keep you updated from the minute they recieve your order to the minute they dispatch it, the prices are reasonable, AND the sh*t turned up less than 24 hours after ordering. Credit where credit is due, thats some epic service.
Anyway, things to do before gym. Update again tomorrow yo!
|
| Point of Reference... Also, wearing all grey... like a boss. |
So my estimate yesterday was a little off, weighed myself thismorning and found that im actually 93.1kg of man-ness. Not too fussed, just a little more work to do I suppose.
Eating today has been pretty sweet, havn't quite started the cold sweats one gets from prolonged Burger King withdrawl which was positive.
Also, I purchased some suppliments last night at like 10.30pm from bodybuilding.co.nz (I know, makes me sound like I think I'm a Hercules). Why do you care, you ask? Because the website is balls out easy to use, they keep you updated from the minute they recieve your order to the minute they dispatch it, the prices are reasonable, AND the sh*t turned up less than 24 hours after ordering. Credit where credit is due, thats some epic service.
Anyway, things to do before gym. Update again tomorrow yo!
Monday 9 July 2012
Day One- Putting it Out There so I Can't Back Out
Sooooo as of today, I am going to take a much healthier approach to life for
one whole month. It doesn't sound like much, but what you must understand is I
am one lazy sonofabitch. I don't like cooking, I gym on an extremely casual
basis, and I don't play any kind of sport.
For the next month, this is all going to change. I'll be trying to eat 6 meals a day, I'll be hitting the protein powder and weight loss supplements, and I'll be gyming at least 4 times a week. Shit is about to get real.
The goal? To up my skuxx level from general skuxx to straight up man dime. Currently sitting around 92kg, I'm going balls out to basically see how much I can drop in a healthy manner. To be fair, I won’t actually be that cut up if I don’t drop that much weight, but I will be working my ass off to see results, whether on the scales or through sheer number of girls hanging off my guns at the end of the month. I'll try and update this on a daily basis, and I'll throw a picture in here and there to keep anyone who wants to read informed.
Any info will be gratefully received, and I will be interested to see if this actually ends up with more views than my usual blog. Should be interesting.
Cheers team, have fun watching me hate life for the next 30 days!
For the next month, this is all going to change. I'll be trying to eat 6 meals a day, I'll be hitting the protein powder and weight loss supplements, and I'll be gyming at least 4 times a week. Shit is about to get real.
The goal? To up my skuxx level from general skuxx to straight up man dime. Currently sitting around 92kg, I'm going balls out to basically see how much I can drop in a healthy manner. To be fair, I won’t actually be that cut up if I don’t drop that much weight, but I will be working my ass off to see results, whether on the scales or through sheer number of girls hanging off my guns at the end of the month. I'll try and update this on a daily basis, and I'll throw a picture in here and there to keep anyone who wants to read informed.
Any info will be gratefully received, and I will be interested to see if this actually ends up with more views than my usual blog. Should be interesting.
Cheers team, have fun watching me hate life for the next 30 days!
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